Why a "Flat" WHY Isn’t a Flaw

If you’ve been questioning your own "flat why" (the kind that doesn’t roar or declare itself), come in. This room knows the quiet purpose that lives between doing and being.

Photo by seyfettin dincturk

Do you think I misspelled there?

Well, I didn’t, but I do see why the pun didn’t amaze you.

Nothing against flat whites (even though I have been lactose intolerant since birth).

Let’s talk about why my why is flat.

And yours might be too.

Hi, hello! Good to see you.

Hope your week has been treating you nicely.

Have you ever heard people spill about “Start with Why”?

Let me say, I have some beef with that.

And no, I have nothing against Simon Sinek. Actually, brilliant.

If you have no idea what I am talking about, you can start here.

But I am pretty sure that even if you have never heard his name, you’ve seen some inspirational post somewhere with the principle.

So, here is the tea.

A few years ago I had this acquaintance who… was in the pool of people that had never heard about the “Why”.

I don’t quite remember how they learned about it... I think it was Netflix, question mark?

But they got inspired. A lot.

To the point that they were obnoxiously preaching to teams,

With... lower morale than you would like them to be at.

Almost in a tone that it’s the company’s way or the highway.

I still remember to this day my coworker saying:

“A book? They are reading a book to make MY work environment better? Honey, you are doing that to make YOUR company better. You better be reading lots of books if you own a company. And my ‘why’? I have to remember WHY I work here? No worries, it’s because I have to pay my tuition. I have bills. I have to eat.”

Even though I wasn’t in the same wavelength as her,

I could understand her point.

What actually bothered me was that… it seemed ironic.

Because their how gave the impression that they didn’t have a why behind what they were doing there.

So I wondered what their why was.

Or if the "why" had actually sunk in.

Which makes it even more ironic.

Nothing like doing “business with people who believe what you believe.”

To marketing & sales teams.

Great.

So, now you know why I have beef with the “why.”

That aside, great concept.

Most people know what they do.

Some know how they do it.

Very few know why they do it.

And the "why" is the belief that drives you.

Not only does it gives you the right direction,

but it also motivates you to keep going when things get hard.

(And surprise, surprise, that's what things usually do.)

Still with me?

It turns out this came to “haunt” me yet again.

Because these last few years have been full of intense inner work.

A lot of personal growth.

I genuinely believe I became a better person for others.

And for myself.

Just as much as I believe the more I learn, the less I know.

Point being,

I pulled a card the other day, The Cheetah¹.

And it is a pretty positive card, action‑prone.

It says “reconnect to the why before you start running.”

Which… fair. Cheshire Cat made his point in… 1800‑something?

Simon and others are best‑selling authors for a reason.

The thing is, I feel like I am a simple gal.

Do I want to reconnect to my purpose? Yeah.

But when I stop to think about it and really look at the core of it, it is not that… exciting.

Or… promising? Even.

Because I don’t feel my purpose is a role.

Nor a career.

Nor a mission statement.

Or an identity.

My purpose is a state of being.

Those I mentioned are expressions, not the root.

I want to be happy.

Aligned.

Doing what feels natural to me.

Everything else is a vehicle for that state.

Therefore, there is no exact formula.

I am here for the ride.

And there are many things that could fill in these spaces.

My “happiness” is a path, not a mood.

And that’s why “reconnect to the why” feels flat for me.

And might feel flat for you too.

Because we often tunnel‑vision our lives into one thing that is supposedly our purpose,

when in actuality it is one of the many things that are vehicles to our purpose.

If you agree with any of the above:

Your purpose is not a job.

Both in the figurative and literal way.

Your purpose is a way of living.

And hey, I am not here to be an idealist prick.

I recognize my privilege to think.

I didn’t grow up around people who lived from their gifts.

Or people who believed in their inner voice,

or that even had the opportunity to have one.

With all my looming doubts, I can guarantee:

I grew up around survival, not self‑expression.

But if you are here,

and you don’t know why your milestones don’t feel as they “are supposed to",

this might be why.

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1: The Wild Unknown Animal Spirit Deck - Kim Krans